If you’d have told me ten years ago that I’d be getting ready to see my sister off to college, I don’t think I would’ve believed you.

The idea was something far away. Saying goodbye? The longest I “said goodbye” was when we had to separate during the school day to go to different classes.

And now here I am, preparing to watch her as she goes onto a new phase in her life, and I am anything but ready.

When I decided I was going to write my final article for the Nest about my sister, I thought it would be easy. Writing is something that comes easily to me, a way to express my feelings and thoughts when speaking aloud isn’t enough. And yet, I have spent hours staring at an open Google Doc, the little cursor blinking away in front of me, and I have been unable to type a single word.

I think it’s because saying goodbye isn’t something that is easy. It’s impossible to put everything out there in a way that is simple and concise. Saying goodbye presents a sort of finality, a proof that things are changing and will continue to change. Saying goodbye feels like the closing of a chapter, the finale of a show. And I have never been good at endings.

What does it mean when someone is your hero?

A hero is someone you admire, someone who has taught you things about the world and about yourself. A hero is someone who shows you the kind of person you want to be, and a hero is someone who makes you want to be better.

My sister is my hero.

I have watched my sister as I’ve grown up, and it is through knowing her that I’ve become the person I am today. She’s my best friend, my hero, my greatest ally. I’ve seen her face insurmountable odds, and I’ve seen her come back stronger every time. She’s taught me what it means to be determined, to never give up even when the world tries to tell you that you can’t succeed. She is the strongest person I know, and because of her, I want to be stronger. She’s taught me so many things—courage, passion, justice, and dedication, to name a few. She’s shown me what it means to love what you do and the people around you.

Finally, to Eliana, because I know you’re going to read this.

Thank you for every moment together. I know we’ve had our ups and downs, but through it all, I’ve never been more grateful to have you as a sister and friend. Thank you for always being there for me, for the car rides together, for dragging me to watch our favorite shows together, for all the dumb jokes and laughs and smiles. Thank you for never giving up on me, and thank you for being the most incredible person I know. You have no idea how proud I am, seeing the person you’ve become. You’re going to do amazingly in college, I know it. Even if we don’t get to see each other every day anymore, I’m always going to be here. I love you so much, Eli.

And thank you for being my sister by chance, and my friend by choice.